Public relations manager Samantha Dellinger spends her days making NASCAR drivers shine. It’s easier than making herself look good. Sam once crossed a sacred line–and forgiveness is out of reach.
When scandal threatens Dellinger Racing, the team hires veteran driver Nate Thomas to help usher in the next era for the organization. As Sam grows closer to Nate, she begins to believe that–with God’s help–she can stop spinning her wheels in the past.
But when Jake Stevens steps into the glow of her porch light, eager to tempt her back into his arms, Sam feels liks she’s going in circles. She is forced to choose between a familiar life of secrets and a new promise of freedom. The stakes have never been higher, and even the right decision could ruin her if she doesn’t discover the true source of real love.
Why I Wrote Going in Circles
When I first sat down to write this novel, it opened in a hospital room, and it was going in a completely different direction than what it eventually became.
God had passed a message along to me: “Write about a real person.” Because I’m a slow learner, I attempted to ignore that message for twelve pages and about two weeks. What I finally figured out was that, when God said, “Write about a real person,” what He meant was, “Write your story.”
Going in Circles is far from autobiographical. (Sam’s life is way busier than mine!) I’ve been known to tell people it’s spiritually autobiographical. The gist of the story is that Samantha Dellinger committed an “unforgiveable” sin, and it’s weighing down every aspect of her life. How she finally gets free is the core story in the novel.
The freedom part of the story is my story. When I was in college, I committed what I figured was the “unforgiveable” sin. (It has come to my attention since I started this book that most of us carry around a sin we think can’t be forgiven.) For an entire decade, I struggled to get over it. It haunted me. I got married, I had a daughter, I had a great life, I had a close relationship with God, but I never could seem to stop beating myself up for what I did. I was terrified it would catch up with me and ruin me.
Then, one day, I was literally on my knees in front of my couch, pretty much railing at God. He’d forgiven me. The people I had wronged had forgiven me. Why in the world couldn’t I get past it and move on?
“Because,” He finally said, “you haven’t forgiven yourself.”
I cried. And I cried. And I cried just a little bit more. That was it! That was the problem. That was why Satan could step in and condemn me and frighten me over and over and over again. I wasn’t showing myself any mercy at all. I wasn’t totally forgiven because I hadn’t bothered to extend forgiveness to myself.
And so, three years after that day, Samantha Dellinger and her struggle came to life on my computer. My prayer is that her story will save someone else a decade of condemnation.
